When the sufferer finds himself completely on his own, alone with back to the wall, all avenues of help closed, feeling utterly helpless and unprotected after his valiant fight against odds, Sweet Chestnut Remedy comes to his help.
Not that this remedy can restore the physical possessions of his lost treasures, but it brings about a change in his mental outlook – the relative values of earthly possessions change (a miser feels tortured on loss of money, a donor feels pleasure in parting with his money). An inner change takes place, a sort of realisation comes that man is nothing. He has no power to defend himself or render any help to others against the will of the Supreme Being.
It is towards the Supreme Being, the religion, God, that his mind turns. He seeks assistance from beyond and expects miracles to happen. That faith sustains him from breaking down under the stress of absolute dejection.
In order to have a clear conception of ‘Hopelessness’ under Bach Flower Remedies remember: ‘SWEET CHESTNUT’ occurs from sudden and unexpected accident. It has an element of shock, and the hopelessness is final without any ray of hope. ‘GORSE’ hopelessness has no element of shock in it. It has evolved from incidents, covering some length of time. Even in the hopeless state of mind, the person can be persuaded to make an other try for getting relief.
‘MUSTARD’ hopelessness has no cause. It is sudden. It comes and goes suddenly. Its effect lasts only for the period for which it stays. There is no premonition of its coming and no trace left after it leaves.
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Stop asking for reassurance Getting reassurance that you look okay may decrease your anxiety temporarily, but soon the anxiety returns, as does the urge to ask again. Quite often, a reassuring reply isn’t believed, so anxiety doesn’t diminish even temporarily. The best thing to do is to stop asking people how you look or if you look okay. If a BDD sufferer asks you to reassure them, it s best not to respond. Instead, you could give a response like “I know you’re upset about how you look, but it doesn’t help for me to respond to you,” or We’ve agreed that it isn’t useful for me to reassure you; this is a BDD ritual that I don’t want to reinforce.” It can help to then encourage the BDD sufferer engage in some activity other than a discussion of appearance. With time, if reassurance isn’t provided, the behavior and the need for reassurance may even-
Limit grooming time Try to limit grooming activities, such as applying makeup, shaving, or styling your hair. Keep it to a reasonable amount of time, for example, 15 minutes a day. Time, rather than how you feel, should be used to determine when to stop the behavior, because people with BDD typically never feel really satisfied with how they look. If you spend a lot of money on beauty products, it’s a good idea to limit this as well, keeping the amount well within your budget.
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